Let Live 6

Let Live 6

Book 1: Chapter

Angelicum

was right. I was kind of looking forward to checking my Facebook account. Once we arrived back at her house, I told her that I was going upstairs to take a bath. I marched up the steps and to my room I went to my duffle bag and pulled out my laptop. I had not been on Facebook in a the condolences that my friends were posting on my page I knew that they were trying to be nice, but it just brought back of the day that turned my whole life upside down

it was a splendid morning. After all, it was the day that I was expecting to bring a new life into this world. My spirits were soaring I was scheduled for a stress test because i was past full term. With any luck at all, they would induce labor and I would be walking through that door with my new bundle 

I did not want Carter to deliver our baby because I wanted him to enjoy just being there. So we chose a female colleague of his that worked at the 

bed cal hospital. I drove myself to the hospital like I had every other prenatal visit Carter was always too busy to get away I left a bag packed by my just in case things unfolded just how I had planned Summer was coming to an end, but it was std a gorgeous warm day Everything looked brighter to 

hat day. The one great thing about summer is that you can have your windows rolled up, your air conditioner running, your radio blaring and you can as loud as you want. I sang louder that day than I did most days 

I arrived at the hospital and parked in a close spot for a change. Thank goodness, because my belly was getting so large that making that walk was becoming increasingly difficult Wadding like a duck is never a good look, I made my way upstairs where the stress test would take place. I even hummed along with the old outdated elevator music. I was in very good spirits. I signed in and anxiously thumbed through old magazines 

The nurse called me back, took my vitals and weighed me. I had stopped reading the scale about four weeks ago. If I had to wait much longer, I was oing to need a wide load sign attached to my back and a horn for when I backed up. I waited patiently for the doctor to come in. Why does it always 

My thoughts kept wandering. I could not wait to see my son’s face. What color eyes would he have? What color would his hair be? This child of mine, I had felt move and squirm and kick for months. I had had many conversations with him and I already loved him very much

The doctor came in 

mein began with the normal chit chat and then she started searching for my son’s heartbeat. She needed to find his heartbeat in order to know where to set the monitors for the stress test. After a few minutes, she looked puzzled. A doctor looking puzzled rarely ends in a good outcome

high spirits were sinking rapidly

Maybe the batteries are deadshe said quietly 18 go get another, I’ll be right back,” and she left quickly. I heard whispering out in the hall, but could not make out what was being said. The nurse in me knew that this was not good, but the mother in me was hoping that I was wrong I thought that I was prepared to be a mother, but nothing prepares you for this. The room just became even colder. I wish I would have brought somebody with me. Why do

to be so independent

Alright, let’s give this another tryI smiled at her apprehensively and laid back so that she could reach that large expanse i called a belly. Again, she moved the microphone slowly over my belly searching intently for that rapid little heartbeat I had heard so many times before. She stepped back and looked at me with a look I will never forget 

Aubrey, we are going to go to the ultrasound room and get a picture of your baby. Is there somebody that we can call to be here with you?At that moment, I became terified. I saw a look of concern that I really could have done without seeing

Tres, call my husband pleasegave her the number and off she went. This was not supposed to be happening. I was to go home in a few days with my precious newborn in my arms

They waited until Carter arrived before they started the ultrasound. When the picture popped up on the screen, the doctor showed me his little heart It was no longer beating. My heart stopped as well 

Within an hour, they had induced my labor and I was well on my way to delivering my son. The only catch was I would not be taking him home with me Because of the chance of infection, I had to endure nine hours of intense labor in order to deliver my stillborn baby I was surrounded by family and I ted to make jokes to ease thee minds. It did not work. I even heard the nurses out in the hallway crying

When he feally arrived, there was silence. There was no first cry. There were no tears of joy. They took him away and cleaned him up. They swaddled 

va blanket and placed him in my arms. It was at that very moment that I learned what a true broken heart felt like

He was they just 4 pounds 11 ounces. He had a tiny bit of blond hair, but mostly a bald little head. Just as most mothers do, I counted all of his fingers and toes. All were accounted for. I tried to memorize every last detail. My memory is all that I would have left. I spent the night on the maternity Door, Intering to the newborn cries The pain was unbearable. I would never have a first birthday party for my son. He would never take his first steps or says first words His grandparents would never get to baby sit on a Saturday night so that Carter and I could have a nice relaxing evening out. What started out as a bright summer day, turned into what remains to this date the darkest day in my life 

The next day, they wheeled me out to my car and I was on my way home emptyhanded and heavy hearted. The drive home remains pretty much a Mur I could hear the radio, but could not comprehend anything that was being said I just wanted to get home, take some Vicodin, and escape the pain These would be no flowers or balloons waiting. There would be no yard sign welcoming the new arrival. There would be only silence

After remembering the events of that day, I decided to take a bath before checking my Facebook I needed to just relax and calm myself down I will 

Book 1 Chapter

never forget that day, but I try to keep it locked in a memory bank in my brain that I do not access on a daily basis. It is much easier that way

I flipped the switch to the gas fireplace that you could see from the bedroom and the bathroom. Yet another exquisite design feature that Angelique requested when having this house but I grabbed one of her Turkish luxury bath towels out of the closet and set it and my robe on the vanity. I sat on the edge of the Jacuzzi bathtub and turned on the water and poured in some bubble bath stepped into the warm oasis and could feel the stress immediately start to melt away Calgon, take me away 

A few minutes after I was in there, I heard a knock at the door 

Aubrey can come in?” 

Before I could answer, Angelique walked in. This was not out of the ordinary Ang and I had no secrets. Brought you a glass of wine,” she smiled as she handed me one of the two enormous wine glasses filled to the brim

Are you trying to get me drunk, Ang?” 

Ha. You wish. Just thought you might need it. Besides, I thought you were probably looking to see if you got a friend invite and I wanted to snoopShe smiled that beautiful smile of hers. I swear she has the straightest teeth that I have ever seen. I truly have a beautiful friend, inside and out

1 am going to check when I get out, you creepMy insult did not affect her at all, she continued prying

Are you nervous

No. He is just an old friend. I am interested to see what he has been up to and that is all I am interested in.” 

we will see,she snickered 

Yeah, we will 

am still married, Ang” 

Yeah, until I catch him redhanded with this other woman.” 

Even then, it is my decision” 

Yeah, yeah. I know, Aubrey. Now, get out of that bath so we can see if we have a fish on the line.” 

You are incomgible. Hand me that towelI took a big chug of my wine. I think I am going to need it

She handed me the towel and I climbed out of the, not as relaxing as I had hoped for, bath. The only way to shut her up was to go look at my Facebook page. I dried off and slipped into my nice warm robe. I was sure that she was not going to give me time to get dressed, so I headed straight for my laptop 

We both plopped down on the bed, lying on our bellies, and looked at the screen. I waited for my pe to boot up and then went straight to Facebook. I had told her that I was not nervous, but to be honest, my stomach was in knots

Hurry up, will you? The suspense is killing me.” 

1 am going to kill you if you don’t chill out. It takes my computer awhile to power up. Patience, young grasshopper,I said knowing that the suspense was killing me as well 

I signed in and waited for the page to load. There it was, a little red icon indicating that I had a friend request. Eek Yes, I squealed like a little girl. What was it about this guy that was making me feel this way? He was just my friend. There was never anything other than friendship between us 

I clicked on the icon. Kyle Warner wants to be your friend, accept or ignore? This seems like a possible complication in my life that is already complicated enough I could just click ignore and never return to the gym again, which would be a positive, or I could accept and welcome a renewed friendship. I clicked accept 

Go to his page, go to his page,Angelique shrieked. It was like we were in high school all over again 

Calm down, he is just a friend for Pete sakes?” I went to his page

Aubrey, I knew it. He is single. It says that he runs his own business too. Sounds like a keeper to me 

I closed my laptop 

What did you do that for?” she asked with a pout on her face 

Because, he is just a friend and you are driving me crazy. Besides, I’m hungry. Want to go make some dinner?” 

Sure, but I want to be the first to know if he messages you.” 

Scouts honor,” I said as I held up my three fingers in the gesture that we were taught as girl scouts 

Angelique headed downstairs to find something to make for dinner I put on some comly, lounge around the house, clothes I brushed through my hair and put my laptop aside knowing that I will ward to look at it again without the prying eyes watching me

I headed down the steps hoping that Ang had something other than tofu and fig leaves to eat for dinner I was hungry and wanted some real food

Book 1 Chapter 6

How

does spaghetti sound?she asked

Sounds amazing, I didn’t know you ate 

Well, I make it a little different. I use ground turkey meat and whole wheat pasta” 

Okay,I said with skepticism

Angelique is quite the cook. She makes her pasta sauce from tomatoes, fresh garlic and onions. I did not even know there was a pasta sauce that did not come from a jar. You would think that as much time as I had spent with her that I would have learned some culinary skills, but nope, it has not happened yet I am guessing that if it has not happened by now, then it probably isn’t going to happen

The aroma from the fresh ingredients was delightful, it took a little longer to make it this way, but Angelique assured me that it would be well worth the wait. While she was making the pasta, I threw together a salad and set the table

After we had polished off another glass of wine, dinner was ready and we sat at the table and enjoyed a nice meal together. We talked about what we were going to do on Friday to find out what Carter was up to 

1 can borrow my assistant’s minivan so that Carter won’t recognize the car we are in Angelique suggested

That sounds good. I am thinking that we just park up the block from the clinic around six in the evening and follow him wherever he goes 

It’s a plan. Should I bring my gun?” 

What? No! Why on Earth would you bring a gun?” 

Well because I am going to want to kill him if he is cheating on my best friend” 

No. I appreciate the thought, but no guns and no killingI smiled thinking that she was just kidding, but wondering if she was not the slightest bit 

senbus

1 was not going to kill, just maim,she joked

We left the conversation at that. We had a plan and I was very interested to see what we were going to find out. We cleaned up our mess and took care of all the dishes. It was still somewhat early, but I wanted to go look at my Facebook account alone. I had to think of something in order to escape 

to my room

Ang, my head is swimming from all the wine. I think I am going to go to bed early” 

Okay, Kiddo. Come get me if you need anything. Goodnight.” 

Night” 

I headed up to my room hoping that I might catch Kyle online and chat with him, I really wanted to know what he had been up to since graduation. If we have been living in the same town all this time, how could I not run into him occasionally

I climbed into my warm bed and grabbed my laptop off of the nightstand. I placed it on my lap and powered it up. I was anxious, excited and confused all at once. I really wanted him to be online, but I was a married woman, even if I was not currently residing with my husband. How can this man from my past affect me like this? It is wrong. Isn’t it

Finally, my laptop was up and connected to the internet. I clicked on the Facebook shortcut and signed in. A little red icon appeared again, this time indicating that I had a message

I clicked on it and read.. 

Aubrey, it was great to see you today at the gym. You look great. I cannot wait to catch up 

with you. It has been way too long. Kyle

A smile graced my face. This is going to be trouble fight as that thought crossed my mind, a small window popped up at the bottom of the screen. Oh shit, it was an instant message from him

Kyle Hi Rubusy

Me: No, just checking the newsfeed,I lied

Kyle: I’m glad I caught u. So, what have u been up 27 

filled him in on what had happened in my not so interesting life since graduation and he did the same. I was very excited to learn that he plays hockey, which is my favorite sport, and that he currently ran his own hockey rink. He had a few serious relationships, but none ever went the distance because he was so focused on the rink and making it a success. It did not leave time for much else. Most women did not want to hang around a hockey rink for fourteen hours a day

We chatted about everything we could think of The conversation came easy. It was as if we had never lost touch. We reminisced about things we used to do together and then I read this… 

3/4 

Kyle: Aubrey, did u know I had a crush on u back then 7 My jaw dropped

Book Chapter

Me Umno 

Kyle. I did. I would tell my friends 2 tell u, because I didn’t have the courage, and then I would change my mind and tell them not

Me: I had no idea 

Kyle: I was so crazy about u. I would look at the schedule and change shifts with people just so I could work with u. I just sat there stunned 

Kyle: I know that sounds creepy, but I figured the more time i spent with u, the greater chance I had 2 actually speak up and ask u out 

Me That’s not creepy I wish u would have said something though. I would have gone out with u. I would have gone out with him. I thought he was cute and funny. He should have asked. I should have paid more attention and maybe I would have seen it

We continued chatting and eventually realized that we had been chatting for hours and it was now one in the morning I was exhausted. We said goodnight and agreed to meet up again tomorrow to chat 

I closed my laptop and laid there trying to process all the information that was just handed me. My thoughts were fast and many. I really liked Kyle i always had, but the timing is not exactly what I would call good. I had enough on my plate without this added mess. After lying there for nearly an hour trying to calm my thoughts, and surprisingly, my excitement, I finally fell asleep. I dreamt of Kyle.

Let Live

Let Live

Status: Ongoing

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